I had my first serious behavior issue this week in class. At one of my schools, Deconinck, I was with all of the 5emes this week. They are about 12 years old or so and still young enough to be kind of adorable. However, they were all terribly behaved this week. I took each class in two groups and tried to do an oral activity about "what do you have in your room? Have you got a bed in your room?" However to review for the activity which uses "have got" I asked them to conjugate "have got" on the board in it's three forms. The full form. I have got. You have got. He has got. and so on. The condensed form. I've got. You've got. And negative. I haven't got. You haven't got. And taught them that I say "I have" in place of "I have got." Because why use an extra stupid word. They asked me what got meant and I couldn't explain it to them. I also tried to teach them the negative. I don't have. He doesn't have. Just to show that there is a different way to say it and not everyone speaks like the english. Even though their teachers want them to speak this way. However, the majority of the classes couldn't do it. They told me that they haven't learned it yet, although they learned it at the beginning of the year. Some kids put up "I aren't" for the full form. Which is the wrong verb, in negative and incorrect for the subject. So this part of the lesson, which was just the warm up took some time.

I have learned to not yell at them anymore to be quiet. I've learned to be quiet myself. Just stand at the front of the class. Stare at them. Or at my watch. This has proven to be quite effective. But this week they were all so squirrely. They couldn't stop moving or talking. My classroom is down a flight from theirs, so we have to walk down, and then back up again when we are done. And I plead, I beg them to be quiet for the 30 seconds that it will take. Impossible. It got to the point where I had to tell one class that their behavior was so bad that if it didn't improve then I wouldn't come to work with them. I think they got it, but they continued to chat away.

So my last day this week, last class. Took the first half. Told them a few things. That they should know how to conjugate "have got" because it's a review. That they should make a little effort. That most of the other groups didn't even get to the planned activity because they weren't capable of doing the warm up. That I've had lots of issues with behavior this week. And that I wasn't sure if I would come back to their class if it continued. That they needed to respect not only me when I'm speaking, but their fellow classmates as well.

AAAAND they were chatty the entire time. But they knew the material and they were able to answer the questions so it wasn't that bad. I took the next half of the class and told them the same thing. They. were. completely. silent. The whole time I talked. They raised their hands politely and quietly to be called up to the board. They stayed quiet while their classmates wrote on the board. They listened. It was creepy quiet. Until I heard a crinkling from the girls in front of my desk. Took the garbage can over to them. Because obviously it was candy. This girl looking at my with her hand over her mouth trying to hide it. She spits it out. only half. I hold it back out to her and she puts her head further into the garbage can to "pretend" to spit the rest out. I decide to deal with it after class and continue on with the lesson. I turn to ask her a question. And she sits there, hand over her mouth again, trying to manipulate the candy so that she can answer the question. Hold the garbage can out. Again. She finally spits it all out.

Continue on again. Turn to a boy in the front row to ask him a question but he is UNDER his desk. So I lean over to ask him the question and there he is, looking up at me with a sucker in his mouth. Front row.  Under his desk. Eating a sucker. So i stand up, take his carnet de correspondance (which is this little book that you can write punishments in, where their absences are, anything else) and throw it onto my desk. And just stand there with my arms crossed looking at him. He finally sits up. Deer in headlights. And after a while I finally said very firmly (not yelling at all. because that doesn't work. and all in french. because he wouldnt understand otherwise.) "That is disrespectful. I am a teacher. Would you do that to your teacher?" he nods no. "Why would you do it to me?" Staring. he sits. The other kids tell him to throw away the sucker, which he finally does. "I don't want to be strict like your other teachers. I want us to have fun when we are together. I want us to do activities that you like and that you are interested in and i want you all to improve your english." and then i just sat and stared and was so upset. "i am very angry."

it was really disappointing to realizes how they don't respect me. That is something they would never do to their teachers. And it just proves that they don't see me as a teacher. They barely listen to anything i say anyways.

And it made me realize that i dont think i can be a teacher. This kid almost cried. They got in a lot of trouble. And then i felt guilty. oops.